Went up to the President’s office and met Sister B. W. Smith had a long talk and did some errands and paid some bills and had callers and telephone calls and heard the shocking news of George Saunders death by accident under the engine while he held the throttle, brought home dead to his wife and children, he married John Whitney’s daughter Annie [Ann Whitney Saunders]– sad sad indeed, went up to Belle’s had supper and stayed all the evening. Bishop Wm. B. Preston died Sunday Aug. 2 at 3. p.M. in Cottonwood brought home same evening funeral Aug. 4. Wednesday– {p. 245}

<Marian [Buchholz]’s Anniversary ten today had she lived¹– took up flowers> Sunday morning went to Temple and only President Winder there of the leading brethren, the speakers were not up to a very high standard Br. Winder spoke a few words Tom Hull offered prayer Loren [Lorin] Farr talked of the Prophet Joseph and his wonderful sayings, said he heard Joseph say in the Grove in Nauvoo, that he was not known and that the people his brethren would never know who he was until after the resurrection, told other wonderful things.² Sister Bathsheba W. Smith spoke briefly and H. [Hannah] C. Wells, Dr. M. C. Roberts, Julia [Stringham] Woolley George M. Cannon, Emma Empey Emma Goddard. I went to the meeting in 18th. ward after dining at Emma Empey’s, then went to Cannon Farm– wrote to Canada & Big Horne Bishop Wm. B. R {p. 246} at dinner at Sister Empeys there were Brother & Sister Adams³ Miss Lisle & Miss Burrows neither of them Mormons Richard W. Young was a guest also.

John Q. had a telegram from Spokane saying Annie would arrive tonight– & little Jack. Bob⁴ has been helping me today Had several letters this morning, none very personal One for Sister B. W. Smith from Annie, more complications about missionaries Sister Farnsworth came and talked about Vernal and I telephoned Susan Grant to come and go with her {p. 247}

<Sunday Josephine Wells Moffat had a son born⁵> Worked hard and finally after all got ready for the meeting and Sister Jennings came and we drove off to the Cannon Ward Annual Meeting of the Relief Society and found a goodly company gathered, Sister Rebecca [Bennion] Sharp and her Counselors and Secretary and many German sisters and it was a very good meeting Sister Smith & myself, Annie W. Cannon & Sarah J. J. Cannon and Martha T. Cannon and some others and then we had refreshments and came away– I had the poem to write for Sister Georgina Fox Young for whom a reception is to be given by the Kindergarteners I tried to get some inspiration on the subject and am so weary but still I have sort of finished it up in a way {p. 248}

<Bishop Preston’s funeral today in the Assembly Hall> All day I have been trying to do something towards my mailing and have had Emmeline helping me but things have dragged, saw Ruth Fox she told me how ill little Emmeline B. [Blanche Fox] is and it is sorrowful to think of her suffering so only such a child. We worked hard and finally I dressed and went to the Bee Hive to the party Donnetta [Smith] Kesler & Emmeline Wells were the principal Committee[,] Presidents Smith & Lund were present not many gentlemen McAllister Gates Shuman Wilcox a few more, Sister Young was presented with a beautiful book a hand painted vase and I read the poem speeches were made by Sisters Thomas & Wilcox and one {p. 249} or two more including Pres. Lund– Willard Done offered prayer– We went out on the lawn afterwards where the beautiful flowers and electric lights were gorgeous.

After coming home a terrific storm of thunder and lightning came on, even Sister Theobald woke up and came into my room, I was not yet in bed. I could not sleep, a terrific night this morning cooler and all day. I have had carpet put down in the office, and have had so much anxiety and suspense, Mailing not yet finished and have had so many disagreeable things {p. 250}

This is a day when a meeting is expected and one feels more or less anxious about matters and things, I had felt that it was not right or proper to have the meeting with so many away but it had been insisted upon by two of the Board However I made ready but there was not a quorum so after all the ones who came five of us went our several ways, Sisters B. W. & Julina L. Smith Ida S. Dusenberry <C. S. Thomas and myself> Emmeline fell down stairs and either broke or sprained her ankle– very badly swollen cannot tell how badly hurt until swelling goes down, quite serious, it seems too bad Alice Horne came afterwards and talked as usual about far away things remote from the present, Ida has Margaret [Dusenberry] here at her Grandma’s⁶ {p. 251}

This is a busy day Sister Theobald my housekeeper is at home doing things and the office is in such a state of confusion and my picture came from the studio to be taken care of and the papers and things here are not put away properly, and I am making another report for Br. Clawson and Emily [Sears Roberts] is to arrive tonight and we are more or less hurried & worried. Some way whisperings come to me that I am to have wonderful changes in my life and it makes one feel queer– I wish I knew why I have this sort of feeling. perhaps it is wrong, yet I seem to see it as well as feel it. George F. Richards telephoned me last evening to try and send one of the General Board to Ogden to see Jane S. Richards, I promised to see Sister Smith our President today and I did, she went with me {p. 252} to the Bee Hive house and we talked with Julina and Prest. Jos. F. Smith came in and said No! let it alone so I came away, perhaps it is best to await results, but certainly she deserves consideration after the good work she has done and 31. years service, and building a Relief Society Stake hall as she has done.

Mailed my report to Rudger Clawson and went up to see Emily Roberts and Margaret at Belle’s and then from there to the Cannon farm to Annie’s and they were just finishing dinner; and Louise and Richard were there, soon a thunder storm came up, and they took the car for home but I stayed on Mamie and baby⁷ and Emily & husband⁸ and two children⁹ came however I got the 8 o’clock car and reached home all right Storm kept up some in the night– {p. 253}

This morning usual routine no mail of consequence and I began correcting copy for the paper, and Lizzie Kimball came <for papers> and took a lot to give to her friends because of her mother¹⁰ and other friends were written up in it, have had so many people today Dot & Emm [Emmeline Whitney Wells] came and Herman, Rudger Clawson and several others. Sister Theobald helped some and I sent off a lot of odd papers. Another thunder shower this evening and very sharp lightning, almost blinding in one’s eyes, telephone will not respond at all tonight so can not get any one, wrote a letter to Mell congratulating Will on his nomination to the Senate of the United States¹¹– also one to Daisie after I came home, and asked her some very important questions, sat up late, had no sleep scarcely {p. 254}

This morning felt very ill scarcely able to get up or go out finally succeeded in getting off had to walk up elevator not in order, letter from Mell good news somewhat comforting, Sister Smith came and we had a talk together over Relief Society affairs, finally Annie came I was still feeling badly but we went off to Belle’s and I had lunch there, Dot and Emily were down town and we stayed quite a while and then came back to the office and commenced my regular work, recalling it was Hebe’s birthday I wrote him a letter also one to Verona and mailed them both, and came out in the street saw Brother Hammond¹² and was talking with him and rain began then lightning etc, and such a vivid storm as seldom comes. lights went out cars stopped &c. {p. 255}

This morning felt a little better although I slept very little, did not lie in bed late but tried to do a few odd things and as usual attended to my Bible reading and devotions, I seem to have very little strength to do my work yet I do a great deal comparatively, Ida came this morning with her little girl Margaret and gave me an acc’t of her trip North with Alice, Lyman [M.] Horne shot his face full of powder while Alice was away. She thinks that he will be all right, his eyes not affected Br. Lambourne came told me Jupiter & Mars were in conjunction causing storms & disaster. A party out in the Lake were lost during the storm All but two are found now John V. Bluth of Ogden came to see me about North West Weber Stake Georgina G. [Geertsen] Marriott to be chosen Pres. R.S. {p. 256}

Messages this morning and hindrances, went off however in fairly good time banked 24.00 a comforting letter from Sister Eggerston [Eggertsen] of Provo, and took over copy had a better day in spirits. wrote a number of letters and cleared up a little, Catharine came in for a minute and I saw Cavendish, had a fine letter from Inez Earl Zilpha Fuller [Earl]’s daughter, she is a scholar and has ambitions, I am very glad of it. Sister Theobald who has been here over ten weeks will leave me tomorrow night she has graduated in obstetrics. Little Virginia Whitney has been hurt in an accident, saw Ort this evening, he is very sober {p. 257}

Went up in good time no letters except check for telephone bill, messages by telephone Margaret came also Miss Buchanan dress maker, Mrs Stayner Mr. & Mrs. Buch from Brooklyn N.Y. She was a Wells sister of Henry Wells, member of Congress from Mississippi lived at Holly Springs, Sister Theobald leaves tonight for home she has made her application for certificate to practise obstetrics, I have Katharine to stay tonight for company, Sister Blair of New York came to help Sister Theobald to the train with baby Bishop Nibley walked home with me from down town & was very gracious, I hope I can find favor with him and Prest. Smith & Apostles, tonight is said to be Saturn’s arrival with the rings visible {p. 258}

It has been a beautiful day and I have been very comfortable without any great strain, Sister B. W. Smith and her daughter Sister Merrill came over and we made some orders for checks etc. I have written letters to Wayne Stake, and to Clarissa and Ida and done quite a few things and had several callers Jos. S. Wells John Q. Cannon, several ladies and a letter from Manti asking for one missionary, do not know how to manage with so little help, I have felt a little lighter in my spirits even though I am still unsettled, Miss Barton came this evening she is a very good young woman. I must prepare copy, I cannot postpone it much longer, I feel very uncomfortable when alone in the house, yet I am aware the Lord will care for me and protect me from all harm. {p. 259}

I felt weak and faint and did not get up until near noon– then bathed and had tea etc. and went up to Belle’s to dinner afterwards to see Louise in her new home and then to the farm to see all the family, especially Emmeline with her lame ankle, we visited and talked over matters and conditions books politics relatives etc. I slept in the room Louise and myself occupied so long and had Katharine for a companion. I did not get much sleep, was restless and wakeful, got up and saw the sun rise over the Wasatch range of mountains, had many very peculiar sensations & thoughts about the heavenly bodies {p. 260}

Left on the ten o’clock car and reached office to find heavy mail was glad to get that which came. Letter from Farley Granger Clark saying he would be here Sep. 9. 1908 for a day, bringing his wife they go on to Los Angelos [Los Angeles] and Spokane, it will be quite an event, I shall be very glad to see them– have had several good letters Betsy Emma Walker came back to me today from Brigham City I was very glad to see her, I am more satisfied now she is quiet, steady and capable, I have had anxiety to get missionaries to go to the various places that are coming on now very soon {p. 261}

Went up late had some letters important tried to answer as many as possible, Annie went to the 4th. Ward Prest. Mary E. Wiles [Mary Chaffin Weiler] Kate came to see me and went over all the family affairs & June & Aunt Hannah’s selfishness and what her father had said to her in Manti which I fully believe and coincide with, Sister Beatie came home from Big Horn and Yellowstone siick with Quinsy, So much sickness and many away in the caňons Lee Greene Richards the artist was married this evening to Mary J. Eldredge of this City, She has money and he has talent. I hope it will be a happy union. I am very fond of him. He is to be in Paris soon. I went up Belle’s tonight, Emma [Sears Roberts] came to the car and all the children Lucile [Buchholz], Margaret [Roberts], Herman [Buchholz]. {p. 262}

Had a very bad night and was really ill this morning could scarcely get up managed to get to the office and have done a great deal of editorial work today. Belle Dot & Emm and the 3 children went to visit Annie at Cannon farm today I hope they had a day of enjoyment,

Callers at the office Sister [Sally Knight] Palmer who is the daughter of Lydia [Goldthwaite] Knight famous in the early days of the Church, Ibbie [Elizabeth] Brockbank Alice M. Horne and others, not hindered as much as usual Wrote Bishop Preston’s death etc for the paper Lydia D. Alder came to see me and spent an hour or more, finally I sent off some mail that was quite necessary and wrote one or two important letters and went home to begin over again {p. 263}

<Last night dreamed of a Lion in the doorway in my room> Have had a better night & feel more as if I could go on with things though all I do is an effort, not much mail Sister Marriott President of the North Weber Stake came to see me and get instructions about the Stake work, soon after Sister Smith came and said the Bishops wanted us over at the office, Sister Merrill her daughter was with her I was just getting ready to go down to see Louise, but went with Sister Smith to the Bishop’s office and met only David the Junior Bishop and John Wells Supt.¹³ of L.D.S. Hospital, who only wanted what I knew before help for the support by clothing sheets napkins etc, then I went to Louise Annie Sisters M. A. Lambert & S. A. J. Cannon were there, we had prayers, Sarah washed and Aunt Alice anointed Sister M. A. Lambert & myself sealed the anointing we had supper afterwards. {p. 264}

Went up in good time office had got locked on the inside it took a couple of hours to get the door opened, boy had to go through transom on step ladder to open it from the inside I had callers in the hall, Sister Olson & 2 children, May Edwards Sister Charlotte [Fox] Richards & Lula Greene Richards, and finally Annie came and we went out to lunch together and she came back and stayed most of the afternoon, I had been too much upset to do my writing, We have learned today that it is our Sister [Annie Mead] Pratt from Cannon Ward that was hurt on Wandamere car, she is at the Hospital in a precarious condition, Went up to Belle’s and had supper and Em. & Dot came with me to the car Betsy came in to tell me a dream she had the night before, she dreamed of a large shady tree in my front yard covered with loaves of bread and we stood {p. 265} <underneath the tree and some dropped down a sample to taste> and it was very fine bread

Today I hope to be better but have had scarcely any sleep went usual time to the office, went on with copy, went to the bank. This is where some stamps were stuck when my diary was wet in tank¹⁴– I did considerable copy, had a Swede publisher here to ask questions about the Relief Society several caller, but no hindrances, in my work Katharine came in and one and another telephoned Sisters Cannon & Farnsworth came home from Wayne Stake today, glad they are safe & well, have finished some special copy and feel more calm. Wrote to Ida tonight, and packed my telescope¹⁵ and went home to go on with writing again {p. 266}

<Amelia Folsom Young 70 years old today> Stayed in bed late, Loren [Laron] Pratt’s funeral today John Q. and Annie attended it in the 17th. Ward Chapel. I went to Belle’s to dinner again, Emily and Margaret [Roberts] are still here, Will [Buchholz] was at home as he usually is on Sunday’s, Dot was in low spirits, Isabel is still suffering with her leg, seems so sad to have such an ailment all one’s life, from Belle’s I went to Louise, met J. J. McLelland [John J. McClellan] and wife¹⁶ he was very nice to me & complimentary At Louise’s found her well and Richard home, he had been out on Missionary work, afterwards went to see Amelia Young who is seventy today born in 1838. came home to do more writing Impromptu party {p. 267}

Working all day long using every particle of energy and brain power but succeeded in getting some copy ready and not many letters only one from Ida that I cared much for– my papers are very disorderly and scattered about– my feelings are not so good I am worried over many things and feel over-anxious. I desire to get the brief history of the Relief Society ready for the book now in preparation and I seem to get no time to do the work, I have longed to write a poem that will be creditable to my posterity and so far it has not been possible and time goes on so rapidly that one can scarcely get through every day duties as they come along from day to day. I have kept steady at work and feel something accomplished {p. 268}

Tuesday all day expected Sister Smith and she did not come I worked on however and late at night, no cessation, I seem never to get through, so many hindrances, letters not very satisfactory and disturbing elements around have such an effect upon me I do not sleep well either and altogether I am rather a nervous wreck. Have written some important letters today and had another from Ida Dusenberry Sister Smith came; and Annie, and we bought the new bookcase and had the pictures hung and finally Sister Smith went home and Annie stayed and worked very hard trying to get things fixed. I was completely exhausted still there were a few things done {p. 269}

I expected Sister Smith but she did not come and so I worked on[.] Margaret came and spent an hour or two and then went out to Saltair with a party of young people I finished my copy and wrote some letters and hunted for my single wrapper book which seems to have got away from me some way or other in the moving. had a very sweet letter from Hebe [Wells] and one or two others from here and there, have had very little sleep & less to eat have only eaten twice a day and long between do not think it good for me not at all, These are days of toil and anxiety, and worry I wish I could keep from it and be more calm and reposeful in spirit {p. 270}

How can I ever forget this day the birth of my little Louie 46 years ago when I really went down into the valley of the shadow of death so much so or so far that even Prest. Wells was alarmed and felt he could not leave me after all was over to go to Cottonwood where he was due appointed by Prest. B. Young. Yet I lived through even that struggle, and many sorrows since greater than that pain or weakness after pain when lif seemed extinct with faintness, that was not so terrible as many trials since, Margaret came up a few minutes Emmeline is still kept in with her lame ankle, I went up to Belle’s and spent an hour or so, she was not at all well Em. and Dot came with me to the car. I took up linen for my garments to be made {p. 271}

Today is Pioneer Stake Relief Society Conference and I expect to go when I reached the Templeton found Sister Smith President of the Relief Society sitting there waiting for me and Edna Smith with her. they came in and Sister Mary E. Smith from Logan came just about the same time, I might have known it was important, but did not have an idea of the special errands and could not have guessed it. Sister Smith dear woman is very easily upset and she had not slept all night because some one envious of our work and the love between us had been trying to make mischief or trouble for us; however we talked it over and she went back with Edna to the Temple, and I had the agent from Logan who was most lovely to me and brought me love from the sister up there, Sister Smith {p. 272} came back and lay on the lounge until I was ready to go to the Conference, We had lunch in the Relief Society hall and a fine meeting afterwards, Sister Smith spoke and Apostle John Henry Smith & myself and it was all satisfactory.

<(found mailing book last night.) Friday 28^th continued here>

Saturday 29. Letter from Verona with draft for 50.00 same as Mell sent in check– I have had Sister Smith first thing with letter about L.D.S. linen¹⁷—so wrought up she wanted to use money from Treasury to get it. I persuaded her to wait for the meeting and not feel uneasy finally I went with her to the Bee Hive and left her there came back to work, all proofs done and begun some sorting of papers, looking up matters for lectures for outline work– sent off letter to St. George and am O so weary {p. 273}

Stayed in bed until noon had little sleep last night, dreamed of Brother George Teasdale that he nominated me for some Convention in New York City, never think of him most peculiar that I dreamed of him. Have done very little today except to go through part of my desk in the bookcase, papers and letters I had not looked at for years. Finally I became quite weary and nervous and dressed and went up to see Belle’s folks and came home before Betsy after all, and did a little writing and reading. These are peculiar days and times and perhaps I feel more than most people of the conditions. At all events I am very sensitive to atmospheric conditions, and unseen suggestions, influences that are potent factors in our lives of which we have no real knowledge. {p. 274}

<Louise Cannon Andrew had twin boys born this morning>¹⁸ Today is the last day of summer and the weather has changed very perceptibly, it is almost too cool, looks and feels like Autumn approaching, yet usually we have hot weather in August. I am so absorbed in work however that I cannot take much notice of conditions except those that directly affect my work I am trying very hard to get my paper out in view of going away and yet hindrances spring up– I made up the paper today at least I stood over Br. Gunther while he did the work. I went down to see Louise this afternoon they are fine boys only rather small but perfect. I took them each a gold ring plain, it is quite astonishing to me that it is there and yet I had thought of it Verona’s letter came today with draft for 50.00 same as her mother gave me, in view of it I feel I must go to see them {p. 275}