<Ort Whitneys birthday born in 1855–> This morning I took a good look around at the home they have here in Ogden. It is next to Br. [William H.] & Sister [Hannah Blench] Pidcock, is an eight roomed brick house with two porches and summer kitchen, barn and out-houses lane etc. fine apple and cherry trees, rosebushes and lilacs and grassy lawn in front. Hannah Pidcock on the strength of our old friendship came and spent the whole day. Had dinner and came back in the evening and brought her daughter who is named for me,¹ I felt rather chagrined that I had never made her a present or recognized the honor in any way. Q. Louise and baby² all seem pleased to see me up here. John Q got a carriage and took us a ride after dinner– [p. 207] {p. 210}

Our ride around Ogden and up on the bench was most delightful. Annie came to the depot with me and John Q. to the City, had a pleasant ride on the train and a little visit with John Q. Came home to lots of work, paper not all up and so many proofs to read. Callers too and folks on all sorts of business. Sarah Kimball came for the second time to ask me what I thought about her going with the Educational excursion to San Francisco and I told her I thought she ought to go. travel is educational in itself and it would be an interesting company most certainly, and all that tends to the development of our higher powers. Evening spent at Mell’s she is not very well either in body or in mind– [p. 208] {p. 211}

Today every one seems making preparations for tomorrow the stores and shops will be closed. It will be a very trying day for us. Leslie [Dunford]’s accident occurred on the 4th which resulted fatally. Mell has never recovered from the shock though she took it very quietly at the time. I had intended going to Ogden but feel I must be with Mell. I have worked so hard even this evening and the cannons or guns and fire crackers are simply dreadful. I dread tomorrow– patriotism is scarcely surviving in those who have had so much to suffer from the parent government– the laws are oppressive and the rulers cruel towards our people. There is to be a fusion celebration– [p. 209] {p. 212}

The night was dreadful with noise and morning more unbearable still. No sleep no rest. We rose late tho’ sleep was not to be thought of. The celebration was at Liberty Park Bishop O. F. Whitney read the declaration of Independence. Gentiles and Mormons united in the parade and in the proceedings of the celebration. The day was so tedious that I felt Mell ought to have a change of some sort and decided we would go to the Lake to Garfield Beach and so we started took an express or light wagonette and reached the depot among an immense crowd of pleasure seekers, after much waiting we at last got aboard the open cars and steamed out of the city [p. 210] {p. 213}

Mell and I had a bath but Verona utterly refused to go in with such a crowd; we had no idea there would be so many people; there were between 4 & 5000 people There was dancing in the pavilion which was handsomely fitted up but we persuaded Verona not to join, there was such a crowd. It was hard work to get the young men to see as we did about it, but we were firm and over-ruled it. the view of the sky the lake the mountains and altogether was indeed a picturesque one but the confusion was terrible. We reached home safely though rather late. Went to Ogden tonight and here I am with Annie & the children, she has had the children up to the grove on the 4th and Q. ran a race [p. 211] {p. 214}

Came down on the morning train– and read my revise found so much work awaiting me it was almost appalling– had visitors from the country that hindered me very much as well as annoyed me beyond expression. A whole party of strangers too that upset me very much indeed. I am not in very good health & my mind is easily disturbed and were I to give way to the sorrows that press so heavily upon me I should assuredly sink underneath the heavy load. But I must not if it were only for other’s sake. I am so worried about Belle who is sick in San Francisco and about Sep. [Septimus Whitney Sears] who has been poisoned with the poison oak– [p. 212] {p. 215}

Today Rule [Rulon Seymour] Wells is 34 years old, how strange it does seem that the children are growing to be heads of families. This is one of my very busiest days– paper came out but scarcely in time to be distributed. I am so annoyed to have it late all the time and yet it seems to be impossible to avoid it. The girls are just about ready to start on their trip West have decided to go by way of Portland. Kate & May are going but Emily [Emeline Young Wells] has given it up. They will go to Belle’s. This was the 14th Ward Meeting day and I wanted so much to go but could not on account of the paper came up to Ogden on the train tonight and Annie and I had a pleasant evening together once more– [p. 213]³

Tried to rest today we sat around and read a little I helped Q pick some red-currents in the garden. Pirate got away but his master caught him again. I intended going home by the night train but we have drawn out the time over dinner & tea too long. Had the supper out under the trees reminding me very much of our garden in days gone by; when the little girls were round me, and we often had our supper under those dear old apple-boughs in the sweet old home now lost to us, and for which we mourn so deeply. We went to bed early and I was quite ill during the night. could not sleep at all. [p. 214] {p. 217}

Came home late Verona is here to help mail. Ort came to talk with me about Emma [Whitney Wells] and Mrs. [Fannie McBride] Cole[,] wants me to go to Manti this week I advised him to write to the Esquire– we had a very serious talk over the matter and I shall do my part. I feel the time has been long & if there is any blessing attending the ceremony of sealing she ought not to be deprived of her blessings.⁴ Wrote to my husband a long letter tonight and went up to Mells very late indeed When I arrived Mell & Verona were both gone out waited for them until I could not endure it, came back to the office and they came on a belated train from Lake Park– [p. 215] {pp. 216 and 218}⁵

Had a very poor night and was thinking much of what I had written and what had been said to me. The girls left this morning also Sister Kimball and Lizzie [Kimball], Evan Stephens, Bessie [Mary Elizabeth] Dean and many others. It will be a pleasant party I feel quite sure. I would have liked Verona to go. however as it was not within our means, she must content herself to do what seems next best. She has many admirers and invitations to go here and there, and enjoy herself in innocent pleasures. I enjoy having her with me ever so much and shall feel it greatly if she goes away. I have been so used to the society of the young– [p. 216] {p. 219}

Today I have been rushing & bustling around to get things in order so I could leave town tomorrow. Verona will keep the Office for me, but she cannot do the work. I bought a new white shirt and basque to go to the Temple, towards evening I found I was to late having been hindered with visitors to catch the 4 o’clock train so had to take 7,20 train for Ogden. Rained, thundered and lightened on the way, and on arriving found only a Derrick to take me up. Annie was greatly surprised & when I told her my errand still more so. The Derrick came for me and I arrived at Mells at 15 minutes past 2. in the morning. [p. 217] {p. 220}

<almost worn out, had very little sleep &>

Left the city on the 7.20 train, traveled ahead of the Old Folks excursion that was going to Lehi. It rained on the way and laid the dust ahead of us. Saw the young girls at Lehi who were to wait on the Old Folks in their white muslin caps and aprons We had a telegram at Nephi saying the carriage would meet us at Chester. We had a pleasant time all the way down and a rather fatiguing drive from Chester to Manti Called at Pres. [Canute] Peterson’s & saw him a few minutes then drove on to Manti. After dinner went with my husband into an upper room and had a conversation about the work we had come to do. Ort went with me to the [p. 218] {p. 221} young ladies meeting & we both spoke–

This morning repaired early to the Temple. I received endowments for Mrs. [Fannie Mc’Bride] Cole and Ort for my brother James [D. Woodward]. I felt the most peculiar sensations all day long as though she was near me and conversing with me. My spirit was drawn out so that I seemed to see & hear not what appeared but things spiritual. After going through we went into the sealing room for the dead and there we Ort and myself were sealed for him and our sweet Emmie and then for him and Fannie Adele Mc’Bride. Such an interesting day I never spent in a Temple before. In the evening went to the Tabernacle Ort spoke. Slept with my husband in the room up stairs. [p. 219] {p. 222}

Ort and I rose very early had a cup of coffee and left in my husband’s buggy for Chester. The ride was lovely in the early morning and our conversation was all of spiritual things, manifestations and individual revelations & testimonies. Took the train at Chester and on arriving at Nephi went to Sister Pitchforth’s and had dinner. I went to the Utah Central Depot to see June [Junius F. Wells] & Abby [Abbie Wells Young] also were enroute for Manti had a little visit with them On our way home afterwards Ort and I had some talk with Pres [Abraham O.] Smoot he told us his views on Church matters pretty plainly and that Pres. [Wilford] Woodruff was in his dotage [p. 220] {p. 223}

Today I lingered around Mells all morning. Mr. [Frank A.] Daniels, music (Vocal) teacher from the New England Conservatory called, and made an appointment to call in the evening again. Went down town ordered ice cream and cakes candy etc. then came to the house and prepared to go to Ogden Left by the 4 o’clock train, saw the balloon ascension at Lake Park from the car window. Met Mr. Ashburnr [Charles A. Ashburner] of the U.S. Geological Survey and Pa. Survey from Pittsburgh. Had a pleasant conversation with him. Drove to Annie’s in a carriage, found them very glad to see me. Had a pleasant evening. took up Annie’s new dress [p. 221] {p. 224}

This morning felt too weak to stir, Annie went with me to the depot on the street car. John Q. is going down on the same train. As soon as I was fairly seated saw Angus Cannon and had his company most of the way down. He introduced me to Mrs. Denwoodey of St. Louis. Reaching the office found lots of mail waiting, and lots of work to be done too. Verona had to go to her painting and could not help me, and I was in a perfect worry with excess of work. There is so much to be done in this world. Sister [Mary Ann Price] Hyde of Sanpete came in and I invited her to go to Ogden to the big meeting on the 19th. [p. 222] {p. 225}

Today Verona is very ill a high fever and sore throat and I have been to Dr. [Francis S.] Bascom and left word for him to go up. I went over to the house across the way to dinner and invited Lydia Ann to go to Ogden with me. There is good news from the girls written from Portland Oregon. They will have a delightful time I am sure. The weather is hot and dry and seems to prostrate every one. I am preparing copy and reading proofs and keeping up office work and using my best endeavor to do all in my power for my family and for Zion. Lots of callers and interruptions. Went up very late indeed Verona still very ill. [p. 223] {p. 226}

Mell seems much alarmed and I am terribly worried. Try to be calm and take all quietly but it seems almost too much for my nerves and strength. Life is very burdensome at times and yet, how we do cling to it. Have been up to Mells again in the middle of the day and Verona very bad. Mell seems to think I ought not to go and yet I have made every arrangement Lydia Ann came over & talked to me when I wanted to be putting up my things and changing my underclothes and at last wearied out I ran almost breathless for a carriage, drove to Mells and then to the depot and reached Ogden perfectly exhausted. Went with Annie to the Standard [p. 224] {p. 227} <Office to see John Q.>

Came to Ogden last evening and this morning Annie drove me to the Tabernacle. Several of the sisters and a few brethren came up from Salt Lake this morning. The meeting is an anniversary of eleven years ago when Brigham Young was here and addressed the sisters and appointed Mrs. Jane S. Richards to preside over the Societies in Weber Stake of Zion. It was indeed a red letter day for women. Brigham Young John Taylor Wilford Woodruff Daniel H. Wells and other great men were present as well as many women of great merit. We had a grand time today⁶ Lydia Ann & Dr. Pratt dined with me at An<nies.> [p. 225] {p. 228}

Last night after coming down on the train Dr. Pratt took me up to Mell’s in her buggy and I found Verona still very sick and Mell low spirited. My fate seems to be to comfort others but never to receive any myself. Today has been tiresome, people coming and going, and my own strength all absorbed in preparing copy. A very hot day. I have been thinking about yesterdays meeting, I believe it was one of the largest meetings at which I have ever spoken. This evening I was expected to be at the Nineteenth Ward Y.L.M.I.A.⁷ but was so weary and I wanted to finish a poem, which I had begun. the wind blew fiercely and I was very lonely. [p. 226] {p. 229}

Last night came up to Mells very late over the hill by the grave-yard. This morning rose early and went down to the Office to see after making up the paper. Then went up to Mells in the middle of the day, so tired and exhausted it seemed impossible to walk. Verona feels better. Daisie will be on the 5 o’clock train It is a disagreeable day. Dusty and dismal yet the sun is piercing hot. Went down to depot to meet Daisie, train was late came back again. walked up to Mells to tell her, then back to the office and the rain began to pour. Went to depot again, the dear girl arrived How delighted we were to see her.⁸ Her mother was very much affected [p. 227] {p. 230}

This morning Daisie rose early but Verona and I staid in bed late. Daisie is much improved and seems like an angel of peace in the house. She has brought every one some little thing. She has been to the old home in New Salem and climbed down in the well after ferns & plants. I went to the Tabernacle John Morgan preached– Afterwards went to Mells to dinner, called at June’s today and have been to the graves of Brigham Young Mary [Ann Angell] Young Emeline [Free] Young Mary V. [Van Cott] Young Augusta Cobb Young and Aunt Eliza Snow This evening have written a letter to Belle, Kate & May are at her house in California. how I shall leave my house & go up to Mells again– [p. 228] {p. 231}

<Saw the total eclipse of the moon last night beautiful sight> I came down very early to see after the paper. Called at the office of the Contributor, saw June & Vic [Victor P. Wells]– and did some other errands. Went across to the Corner House to dinner, did not feel very well, the day was stifling. Remember that two years ago my darling Louie was here with me. O how changed my life is without her sweet presence. She was so genial so full of sympathetic tenderness, and all her disposition was so gentle and so angelic. Mell came to help me in the afternoon, and we did the city mailing. Verona is better and Daisie is at home with her. This evening I stayed here alone and wrote a poem of three verses for my husband that I had promised him. I also wrote him a short letter went up to Mell’s at eleven o’clock [p. 229] {p. 232}

Forty one years ago today the pioneers made a formal entrance into these valleys. A celebration in honor of the memorable occasion has been kept in the big Tabernacle. There were only six of the original pioneers on the platform. Many of them are now dead and some are in remote parts of the country. Those who were there were Br. [Charles D.] Barnham, [Jacob] Weiler [Millen] Atwood, [George] Woodward, & Lorenzo D. Young and Mrs. Clara Decker Young widow of Brigham Young. The first song was my composition “Our Mountain Home So Dear.” I was invited to occupy a seat on the platform; the exercises were for the Sunday School as well as the pioneers. Afterwards came to the office and wrote to Annie and did one or two other things that were needed at home. [p. 230] {p. 233}

Today I have been trying to get a little mailing done alone Mell Daisie and Verona had lunch here and went over to the Lake. Garfield Beach. I had some strange visitors from the East but direct from California they know Miss Walsh who was erst so intimate with Mrs. [Hannah Tapfield] King. Mrs. Brown the lady has a new religion which she advocates very zealously and is much absorbed in. It is very similar to the Christian science– Emily [Hill] Woodmansee came to see me, she complemented my poem Consolation recently published⁹ Dr. Maggie C. Shipp also praised it and so has Mell much to my surprise. Sister [Matilda Picton] Teasdale of Nephi came to see me this morning had her two boys¹⁰ with her. Have had a call from Helen too and several more [p. 231] {p. 234}

This morning we expect Annie from Ogden Mell came down too and Verona came to help with the mailing. Sister [Jane S.] Richards came and we had some talk of the great meeting on the 19th and what should be published about it. Mrs. Cheshire a stranger came and had some conversation with me on our faith Annie had lunch here and then went to Mells to dinner. Daisie brought each one of us a little gift. To me a little book Stray Notes from great Musicians. How much I have though of Louie yesterday and today. I feel that I must write to John Q. as we are both of us too busy and too deeply absorbed in her to talk freely. Verona went out to the Lake with Melvin and Annie went away on the 7.20 train. I am here in the parlor alone– [p. 232] {p. 235}

Came down early again this morning. The woman has been cleaning two days this week. Verona came to assist me, Quite a party of strangers came in and bought some copies of the paper. I am not very well, in fact my strength is quite exhausted. I have not felt like myself for several days. I have in my mind something I wish very much to write but I see no opportunity so much talking and all to no purpose. Sisters Richards Taylor, Teasdale, L. A. Wells and ever so many more to see me, it takes so much time, that unless my strength would hold out to write at night I should have really no time for it. Lula has been in today too. She is not very well either, so it goes. [p. 233] {p. 236}

This is an anniversary of great importance to me and I feel very sober and solemn even when I recall all that transpired on that memorable occasion forty five years ago.¹¹ Life was all sunshine then full of dreamy romance, and the scenes enacted in my history were so tragic even that looking back I shudder and wonder how I survived it all and kept my brain steady. Today I have had some very peculiar thoughts and feelings and there seems to have been around me such peculiar associations of intangible things. I am strangely wrought upon and my heart is curiously affected. Besides the piano was moved up to Mells today and I felt it very keenly I thought it wrong to keep it here when Daisie needed one so much and had no way of getting one. And so I lent it. [p. 234] {p. 237}The house is very lonely without it and the tears will come in my eyes though I try very hard to keep them back. Louie seems so near me and Emmie too O my darlings in heaven! That I may do something worthy of a place near them. I want so much to write a poem that shall be immortal.

I lingered in bed this morning to rest and recuperate. Came down between one & two p.m. and bathed and so forth. Went to the depot and took train for Ogden arrived at the depot saw John Q. who put me in a carriage and I went up to Annie’s found her very miserable indeed. Emily Cannon is still there. Dinner was over but we had a nice time and ice cream in the evening; sat in the parlor and enjoyed ourselves. [p. 235] {p. 238}

Today Louise [Cannon] is four years old. How well I remember every detail of that eventful morning. What a little beauty she was and is! I brought her a pin with Lillies of the valley, her mother gave her an elegant pink sash– Q. pretty little slippers, Margaret a pair of mitts. John Q. sprained his ankle last evening jumping from the train, it is quite lame this morning. He came on the train with me to Salt Lake. He came here and took lunch with me. Verona was here to lunch before he came. She is busy painting china. Had a letter from Belle today. Good news! Daisie has called and I have had the twins Cannons¹² and several others. Wrote to Sister Howard and Kate [Katherine Howard] Brockbank tonight. [p. 236] {p. 239}

Wrote to Dr. Pratt this morning about reports for St. John’s A. Z. [Arizona] also about going to Sister Howards. Sister Richards and husband came with minutes of Anniversary meeting in Ogden on July 19. Rained a little this is Melvin Wells birthday he has attained his majority. 21 years old. I gave him a bottle of perfumery cut glass price 5.00 cost me less though. I received from the International Council the book containing all the doings in complete form. Have had many sorrowful feelings today and tonight I feel languid and weary beyond expression Sister Richards has been with me a great part of the day and we have talked over many matters. Have had a great many callers. Tonight I am here alone in my parlor but all the light has gone out, and so changed is all my life I cannot tell how I shall bear it. [p. 237] {p. 240}