This morning was dull & cloudy and we had an early breakfast– Geo. [D.] Pyper called– A carriage came and I went with Mell to the depot– Dot stayed at the Office & finally she had to go on the train– I felt the parting very much indeed– not knowing when or how we shall meet again. It is always sad, more so for those who stay than those who go– for there is something new to be seen in traveling and the mind is diverted whereas those who remain in the same places, can only live upon the past. It is 25 years ago today since Mell went from her childhoods home a young & blushing bride of seventeen– [p. 304] {p. 268}

All day it seemed as if some one was dead, such gloominess always hangs round the place deserted by a <true> friend or near & dear relative– I worried some about Mell, yet felt she would be protected upon her journey; how earnestly I pray that she may find all well at home and nothing mar the pleasure of her journey. Several of the family called to day to see her thinking she was not yet gone. I am much behind with my work and Conference so very near. But I must persevere and not give up though I do feel much inclined to Dot is here most of the time, she stayed with me last night I must not be left alone too much. [p. 305] {p. 269}

Today Conference people begin coming in but money is very slow– Emma Kofod’s father¹ came and brought me a bottle of homemade wine and some large pears. It is good to be remembered even in small things, love is everything. I cannot invite people to stay with me as I did in former days. Oh how much I miss my husband’s coming at this time, how we used to look forward to it and watch for his visits and how glad and happy he always seemed to come into our homes and hear all the little gossip and items of news and how he sympathized with every grievance and what comfort every word imparted to our hearts– O those days are <gone now forever.> [p. 306] {p. 270}

This was the opening of the Conference– the preaching was very old-fashioned Pres. Woodruff just like himself telling in his plain straight forward way, the story of his experience in the Church, how he had outlived all his fellow-laborers and come upon another generation, and the Lord had shewn him his will and he had to give it to the people. Geo. Q. & Joseph F. also bore testimony to the same things concerning the manifesto and the practise of plural marriage. It is a time of trial for many of the Saints and truly barriers are being burned away and a great revolution taking place [p. 307] {p. 271}

More people have flocked in to the Conference and to the City for other purposes while the Railroads are giving special rates. Trade is not so very brisk because of the scarcity of money & in my business money is very slow– I have had lots of people coming to see me and make inquiries concerning Relief Society work etc. but few to subscribe or to pay up back accounts. I can not go up to see Annie until after the Conference is over. I could not get to the meeting today but have heard the tenor of it from others. [p. 308] {p. 272}

<47 years ago today my little boy² died.> I felt determined to go to the Conference this last day but very nearly failed, this morning could not get there, but learned that when the authorities were voted upon John W. Young’s name was not put up at all, and some explanations were made that until his business was settled up etc. also that he had written to ask that his name be withheld This afternoon seemed to astonish the people with its plain teaching and the adoption of resolutions of protest against the slanders and misrepresentations made to the world and especially to the government– what the result will be time alone can determine, it is indeed a new movement [p. 309] {p. 273}

Today was the meeting of Relief Society in General Conference. The meeting was only in the forenoon, the Young Ladies Conference in the afternoon and evening, it gave very little time to the Relief Society, it was not possible to have many speeches and other business had to be very brief.

The country people are beginning to return home, and there is not so much going on as for a few days past. This year has been a <year of> plenty but not much money in the market. I have taken less in than usual & so has the Deseret News– and other business places make the same complaint [p. 310] {p. 274}

The City is not so dull as it would be if it were not for the Fair which is still open– I went up today for awhile– the Ladies Committee do not agree very well– there is a great deal of jealousy. Belle went for a little while today October is a lovely month and the hills and mountain tops are beautiful. There have been some very grand Autumnal sunsets. [p. 311] {p. 275}

Belle made a party for Father [John] Sears and the family and it was a very great success– turkey and roast beef and vegetables of several kinds, celery, etc. tea and coffee and beer etc. Father and Mother [Sarah Wagstaff] Sears had a fine time and Isaac [Sears] and family and Nate [Nathan Sears] and wife³ were here and it was really quite a gathering many reminiscences of the old country were gone over–. the parlor looked very inviting and father and mother Sears <&> slept in Belle’s bed and Dot went home with me and stayed Sep sung for the company and was quite entertaining it was quite a pleasant time and I think all enjoyed it. [p. 316] {p. 276}

This morning Mr. Sears started for San Francisco on business not knowing how long he might be away. [p. 317] {p. 277}

This day sixteen years ago I remember well. It was kind of a disagreeable day and Mell had been very miserable and suffering a great deal of pain and finally the Dr. was sent for and the nurse and then there was all the usual anxiety and waiting and the nervous tension of the mother as well as the sufferer. Will was much exercised for it was his first experience and it seemed hard to him, but when it was over then there was rejoicing. And yet Mell was quite low. That is all past now and the little one⁴ lies in the grave up yonder, her body only for her pure spirit passed away above into the brightest and holiest place of all to be with Him who loved little children [p. 319] {p. 278}

Dot’s birthday she invited just whom she liked Ort & Zine Geo. Pyper & Em. Johnnie [John D. Spencer] & Clint [Clarissa Young Spencer]– and myself, we were all– there was an excellent dinner and handsomely served. Dot joined the Choral Society tonight and all the guests except Ort & Zine went off to the Choral union, we four Belle Ort & Zine with myself spent the evening in the parlor– it seemed kind of lonesome after having so many jolly people at table. But such is the usual way when pleasure sits high at a banquet the reaction is sure to come. Mr. Sears is away gone to San Francisco– and Belle is left again [p. 322] {p. 279}

This is a day of remembrances for all our family⁵ Belle & her children and all the grandchildren who are here have gone up in the Big Utah⁶ with flowers to decorate the grave of their grandfather. It will be a kind of reminder to them hereafter and is really a very graceful tribute to pay to one who loved them all so much. They carried an abundance of beautiful flowers, and literally covered the grave. In the evening the family met at 323 2nd St. Belle Sep, Dot & Lucile, Annie could not come Lydia Ann was in Manti & Mell [Melvin] Wells in Montpelier [Idaho]. Mell Woods and her family were all away– We had nice refreshments and the evening passed without any jar. June made a short speech– [p. 330] {p. 281}⁷

Today Belle was quite ill the effects of over-exertion yesterday I presume, and walking so much has injured her hip and it is likely to gather. I went up and staid Zine Whitney was there and baby and stayed all day. Went up again and slept there all night. Dot waited on her mother though and slept with her. I slept up in Dot’s room. I feel anxious but think a few days will bring her round again all right. She has been much worried until Mr. Sears went away and now she cannot rest. Her nerves are fairly unstrung and she needs more perfect quiet. [p. 331] {p. 280}

Belle is still very bad worse today than before, perhaps after she has gathered it to a head she will be better. I bought a new book and brought up, but she did not feel as if she could read at all, her head is so bad– She has to write every day to Mr. Sears whether or not– he will not take any excuses. Little Brent [Brenton M. Sears] is very good. I would like her to be administered to and she would like to. I have tried to exercise faith for her in prayer & I feel she will be better soon. Letter from Belva Lockwood about going to Boston to attend the Press Federation held there at the same time as the W.C.T.U. Convention⁸ [p. 332] {p. 282}

Father and Mother Sears came up this morning and Father Sears administered to Belle, she seemed to have faith and will no doubt get better now very soon. Zine has been quite attentive to her and comes in and out every day. Dot went to the theatre with Vic Wells he is quite attentive to her and I think enjoys going out with her very much indeed.

Sat. Oct. 31. Utah Woman’s Press Club organized at my office in the parlors present E. B. Wells L. L. G. Richards, Susa Y. Gates, Ellis R. Shipp, Romania B. Pratt Ruth M. [May] Fox, Julia [Ivins] McDonald Lucy A. [Rice] Clark.⁹ [p. 333] {p. 283}

Hallow e’en we’ve been looking up on the why’s and wherefore’s of the name, its origin etc. the girls Dot & Lucile are both invited out to parties, Lucile to Dr. Benedict’s and Dot to Susie Reter’s [Susan Denton Riter] Sep is going some where else for Hallow e’en. Belle is quite sick, Zine is there and I spent the evening and the night– the girls were dressed beautifully Lucile as a Japanese Dot in white– Victor came to take Dot– tomorrow is Sunday which seems inappropriate for Hallow e’en– it seems to have revived very greatly as have many other old superstitions– and customs– [p. 334] {p. 284}