Today twenty three years ago we went to the Altar with Mell– thinking how happily she was being married– and we had a wedding-feast and rejoicing– but lo and behold it turned to mourning ere long and our hearts were more sorrowful than as if we had buried our loved one. And now Mamie Cannon has gone to Logan to be married and I trust it will not be an unhappy union– She has everything in her favor– wealth, position and I trust true love– still one cannot help feeling a certain amount of anxiety on a wedding day of one who is much beloved. It is a rather stormy day, and the winds are sighing melancholy and sorrowful. Life is full of changes and we cannot be assured of either happiness or prosperity. [p. 298] {p. 298}

The wedding party returned last night. Annie came down today and stayed with me a while before going to the farm– John Q. was with her and we were quite jubilant. She had some wedding gifts for both Mamie & Hugh and showed them to us all. Talula came over and staid a few minutes and Nett and May were both here. I went off at five o’clock and left everything for Annie & John Q. to come in and sleep here after the wedding. I arrived in Ogden in time to find the baby crying for Mamma the cow lost etc. Q. off on his pony hunting her and the calf and pig; just caught & brought in. Q. found the cow and we all rejoiced & went to bed happy– [p. 299] {p. 299}

Today I stayed at Annie’s notwithstanding the fact that I had been advertised to speak at a meeting of the Woman Suffrage Association or rather a Convention in Salt Lake–¹ Annie did not come and I would not leave the children Annie & John Q. came on the 1/2 past four train too late for me arriving about the time I ought to have started down so I stayed all night– we had a nice evening Annie told me all about the wedding and it seemed almost the same as being present– I had enjoyed being with the children and little Daniel was quite good with me all the time. They are certainly very superior children and so they ought to be certainly, on both sides of the <house> [p. 300] {p. 300}

Went to the train 1/2 past nine and sat waiting until 12 noon before we pulled out of the Ogden depot– cars and cars loaded packed with people going to Conference such a jam and such dissatisfaction about waiting and I was as impatient in my feelings as any one could be, but it was of no use– did not arrive until about one o’clock, people going back into the Tabernacle for the afternoon service I had some arrangements to make for the Relief Society Conference and that with my work on the paper was enough to make any one feel as if life was too short– there are lots of people in from the country. Emma’s father and mother and baby² all here and will stay until after Conference– [p. 301] {p. 301}

Last night the ’Squire came in from Manti but I did not know it until I saw him in the meeting– this is the first day I have attended, heard Br. Woodruff and Geo. Q. Cannon. a very crowded house, thousands of people in from the country and hardly places enough to accommodate the people. The preaching has been excellent and the people who were famishing for the bread of life are having their souls feasted with the Word of the Lord. In the evening there was a Conference of the Primary at the Assembly Hall Mrs. Louie B. Felt presiding, with her Counselors Louia [Lelia Tuckett] Freeze & Clara [Clarissa Moses] Cannon Sister Zina & I were invited to sit on the stand and to speak. I was requested to make the opening prayer [p. 302] {p. 302}

At the afternoon meeting yesterday the people were notified that business of importance would be presented to the Conference consequently a great crowd was attracted thither, I had to go and do some errands of importance in the 15th & then in the 20th ward and could not get to the meeting but I knew the manifesto was to be read and a vote taken on it, this was done, and many testified of its truth and the inspiration that prompted from the spirit of the meeting. Conference closed in the afternoon adjourning until April 1891. Dates to be furnished when known. It has been an exciting time on account of the Manifesto and the preaching & teaching tending in that direction– [p. 303] {p. 303}

Today the Fair is the greatest attraction Conference being over. Br. & Sister [Hans C. and Elna Nilsson] Kofod have gone home and Emma has decided to stay a month longer. I am busy trying to get up with my work so many hindrances make it almost impossible to get through so much & Emma does so little beside getting the meals ready. Country people flocking in for this and that and to ask questions about things they don’t understand, and it all hinders and takes one’s time. I am trying to get some money together for the printers but the people pay so poorly for their subscription. My husband came tonight to stay here and the entire evening had to be devoted to him He is very miserable suffering from piles,³ he has some medicine from Johnson & Pratts drug store [p. 304] {p. 304}

This morning we were very late getting up and then I had to wait on so many people, but my husband sat in the parlor reading and I went in and out & took him in some of the callers to chat awhile, so it livened up the time even while I was busy. I am trying to get off my mail and rush the girls up with the other paper, but it is hard work to get suitable copy, even those who can afford to pay are not very successful & I depend entirely upon those who like to get into print. I have offered some inducements besides subscription free, but it is not much of a success. I have to do a great deal myself and depend upon my sister⁴ and two or three others. [p. 305] {p. 305}

Still plodding away at my mailing and manuscript. There seems no alternative except to work. I could write if I had the time more creditably. Annie has no time to help me because of her growing family and cares. Some arrests of the brethren are being made, but not much testimony taken and people are observing the law in its strictest sense and avoid prosecution. This is the tendency of all the preaching nowadays. and there can be no opportunity for married men to increase their families. All must rmaein [remain] as they are, how peculiar the change after more than 40 years. There is a class who do not relish it <at> all and think the Lord has not been seen in it or had any hand in it. The Templeton was open during this week, Wednesday. Alonzo Young Manager– [p. 306] {p. 306}

Today it is 38 years since I was sealed to Gen. Wells for time, it was Sunday and the Conference had just closed, and I wore what we used to call a Belzarine dress made in Nauvoo, very pretty material soft and light– I remember nothing else– except that Steve Taylor came with him to drive the light covered carriage and we sat on a seat inside together; Brigham Young married us and then we had supper here in this very house in the same dining room I use now, and the Office I have was where I was married also Lydia Ann Susan & Hannah– then after supper I went out in the orchard at the back of the house & talked with Louisa, then my husband went home with me & stayed that night– [p. 307] {p. 307} Auntie⁵ kept the children; but as my school was not out I had to go next morning to teach, so we did not have time to visit in the morning. I remember how new and different my life was after that–

⁶|Last evening I came up to Ogden and returned today Annie is pretty well and the children are going on fine, little Daniel especially. I came down on a late morning train and reached here in time to attend to some of the many callers, who are just about through their visits to the City and finishing up their business. It is always crowded on Saturdays even without Conference. Letters from the North and from San Francisco Belle is quite sick, not able to go out at all. Dot is quite unwell too has gatherings⁷ in her head, had to stay from school. [p. 308] {p. 308}

Rested and read in the morning went to meeting in the afternoon, heard John Morgan preach and enjoyed it very much indeed. I had a nice warm fire in the parlor only put the stove up the day before and I was here alone waiting for him when he came. He is a little better I got the Anakesis and he has used some little and is a very little improved. He keeps up good courage for one in his condition and at his time of life. We have discussed almost every subject within our reach and given our opinions. With some slight differences we agree in a general way, and never have had a difficulty a serious one because it will not answer to be too positive with him or anyone else for that matter. We sat up kind of late enjoying the luxury of each other’s company– [p. 309] {p. 309}

Such a dreadful dreary day and yet it was modified by my husband’s presence– I had a nice warm fire in the parlor on purpose for him, had the stove put up on Saturday and cleaned and made shining & a bright cheerful fire burning in it. He came and found me in the Office but we went into the parlor and there we held a short tete-a-tete– and I cautioned him concerning his health– and we talked over a lot of things. He seemed a little better but he is weak and feeble and I fear he has not many more years to live– he is coming up again soon to spend his birthday; and then I hope he will be greatly improved in his health he will have his new teeth put in today. [p. 310] {p. 310}

<Tonight meeting in the 15th Ward> My husband has gone to Manti and May with him– it is a blessing to have one of his own daughters to attend to him, for he is in need of some one. I feel as if I would like to go and be in the Temple the rest of my days; especially with him; but my work at present is very temporal. Weather is very cold and unpleasant every indication of a severe and early winter. I feel very melancholy indeed and can scarcely keep up on account of it. I have so much on my mind that I can scarcely keep my equaninimity at all. So many coming and going and so much confusion and my mind so occupied and my work pressing me– Mrs. [Annie] Becker formerly Mrs. Cast is dead in the 15th Ward– [p. 311] {p. 311}

Last night was windy and disagreeable, and I went alone to the fifteenth Ward meeting house– handsomely decorated with national flags. Mrs. S. M. Kimball presided & I spoke for some time– Mrs. C. Louise Boyden recited two pieces– came home alone called on the Herald and gave a notice for the morning– Mr. [Charles] Ellis gives a Lecture in the Theatre tonight against our enemies– I had a ticket complimentary but am invited to the 11th Ward Y.L.M.I.A. and shall go there. Worked hard to get off and at last succeeded– I was very glad too that I did go– Mrs. Lizzie [Elizabeth Liddell] Felt presided and there was a very large assembly, everything pleasant. I spoke for some time and felt blest in doing so. We had excellent refreshments & spent a joyous evening– [p. 312] {p. 312}

This would have been little sweet Winnie [Winnifred I. Woods]’s birthday; she would have been fifteen years old if she had lived. O, how angelic she was her great wide open blue eyes reminded one always of the stars and her brow was like alabaster. Wrote to Mell today and sent her the bill I had paid. I gave her all particulars of the work done in the cemetery. told her about the birthday, I would like to have a message from her but do not much expect it. It is Mamie Cannon’s birthday too she is twenty four today. She has just been to the Temple and returned this evening. Br. Cannon’s family have been adopted to his father & mother Abram stood for the father⁸ & Mamie for the mother,⁹ there were 6. 3 sons & three daughters.¹⁰ [p. 313] {p. 313}

This is a busy day for me and yet I have not been doing much work. I went up to see Emily Richards called at Abbie’s and at Zine Whitneys neither one at home, Went to Jun’s and had dinner a nice cup of coffee– came home called at Emeline’s and at Sister Horne’s– such a lovely evening– sunset glorious, and I gazed my fill as I came over the hill. I am trying to get inspiration for a poem for the birthday– I have had so much to do and so many things to annoy me I scarce know how to write as I ought. I have sent Dot a gold thimble for her 18th birthday. I do hope she will be pleased & also her mother– my heart is full of sorrows and sad experiences– [p. 314] {p. 314}

Such a splendid October day hurried up with my work and tried to get off to Ogden– and at last succeeded. Dr. Pratt came to see me and I excused myself from the work in hand because of the mailing and other business. This would have been Cory [H. Corydon] Granger’s birthday– he was killed instantly on the battlefield at [blank space] and is buried in Virginia among the soldiers who fell during that dreadful war. It is a nice day. Arriving at Ogden found Annie had been making a purchase of a folding bed which was just being put in. and the children met me outside with the news of the Jersey’s cow’s death of bloating. so sad to lose so much stock, for want of care– – [p. 315] {p. 315}

This is Belle’s oldest girl’s birthday– she is eighteen– how I do hope she will be preserved pure and true to her faith and a blessing to us all. She is indeed very beautiful and may heaven grant her life as perfect as her face and figure. I am here at Annie’s in Ogden but my heart is with Belle & her little ones today. Heavn bless her and shield them from all harm and give us peace and make our pathway clear before us. I called on Sister Jane S. Richards, and also on Sister Josephine West, she has been very ill, but is better now– Br. Geo. Q. Cannon is in Ogden attending the Conference and came over to dinner and we had a very nice time. In the evening only Annie John Q. & myself– [p. 316] {p. 316}

John Q. brought me to the depot this morning and I caught the train. Came home at eleven. June was here immediately to ask me to go to Auntie Gombar [Sarah Gomber Wells]’s funeral and I went off with him. Bishop [Frederick] Kesler & Bishop [George] Romney were there also Geo. [F.] Gibbs and J. [Joseph] F. Simmons. The funeral was in Lydia Ann’s parlor & there was quite a few people gathered there considering. After we had been to the grave– I went there to dinner and then coming home learned that Aunt Zina wanted me went over there. Jacob Miller came to see me regarding Annie Christenson Aunt Zina heard all and I was very glad of it as she had been solicited in reference to the matter. Am here alone tonight and so exhausted. [p. 317] {p. 317}

Was busy mailing nearly all the day, had a number of callers and a little good news. My youngest brother¹¹ has been nominated to the Legislature of the State of Mass. that is an honor– and the newspaper notices are very flattering, giving such good account of him. as soldier citizen and man of honor. I rejoice on my mother’s account, on her part she always said he was bound to fill some high position of trust. At evening I was alone and wrote letters to Mrs. S. A. Rowle [Rawle] of Morgan, Josie E. [Coates] Childs Orangeville, Olivia [Nielsen] Widerborg, Brigham City and to my husband. To Susan Grant Bountiful, such a weary day and so much to tire one, and yet all was well. [p. 318] {p. 318}

This morning had a letter from Verona and from E. A. [Eliza Ann Hales] Ogilvie, Richfield. A poor blind man came to see me– and told me some of his troubles and sorrows. He came for sympathy for another poor sufferer Peter Moffatt. a Scotchman. All the day have been working at the mailing, heard yesterday that Hebe Wells was engaged to Birdie [Teresa] Clawson. Lydia Ann came to see me and brought a letter from May to Ort for me to deliver. I went to the President’s office with it where I found him writing away on the History of Utah. He is thoroughly absorbed in it so much so as to lose sight of all else that is of importance. Miss [Mary E.] Cook & Sarah Jane Cannon have been in to see me. I feel very uneasy about my poem that I have promised for the birthday: had a peculiar dream last night about my husband. [p. 319] {p. 319}

three years today since our little darling Percival [Woods] died, and I was in that very house tonight. What a sad time that was! And now how everything has changed. So much to think of in the past– I went to see Sister Sarah G. Richards today. What a pretty picture she made as I saw her thro’ the window– I must write it for my paper. I heard her tell of the great people she had known in her life– then I called on Mrs. [Margaret Nightingale] Caine and found the Delegate¹² himself at home– she is very sweet I like her very much– came home and went up to the house where Mell lived– took Cal. [Clara Wells Hedges] Longfellows poems, it is her birthday and wedding-day too– 28 today– she is a very sweet young woman. Came home and attempted writing a poem– for the birthday. [p. 320] {p. 320}

Susa [Young Gates] came early this morning and I visited a great deal with her– strangers came and seemed very much opposed.

I have been busy with copy and had quite a number of callers and my sister Adeline [Woodward Earl] came and told me about the new house she shas– near Liberty Park Am trying to write a poem for the birthday, such a difficult matter not a poetical subject– Ort & Zine invited me to go riding but I was so busy I could not accept. I am not very well and my duties are so numerous and complicated I have had a most terrible hard summer with work and worry and anxiety and now winter is coming and no preparation on my part nothing beforehand and only a struggle to pull through [p. 321] {p. 321}

Today is pleasant and I am trying to get a few minutes to myself to go over my poem and revise and add to etc and make it creditable– some of the folks are making great calculations, I have given my share in money and I have given liberally so I think and believe– considering I have nothing except what I work for– however I am glad that I am independent and only wish to be so in the future. I have had some good news from my brother– he has been nominated to the Legislature of Mass. and the papers speak very highly of him as a citizen as a public man and as a soldier in the war of the Rebellion– I feel very proud of his record.– [p. 322] {p. 322}

This morning I sat writing some– then went to meeting Ort preached– a very eloquent sermon– and afterwards I came in and went over my poem again– did some other writing and read a little as well– tomorrow Annie & the little ones will be here and John Q. I hope it seems pretty fine weather my husband came home last night; he was on the stand today– I saw him for a moment when he passed in the buggy– he looks very feeble and no color in him at all– I wanted to go to the evening meeting but felt too ill and exhausted. My poem does not suit me but alas I am fearful it must answer for I do not see how I could write another Aunt Zina was married to the Prophet Joseph on the 27th of October 1841 [p. 323] {p. 323}

This is the birthday John Q. Annie & the children came and had lunch here, the children all have new things Q. has a new suit and Louise & Margaret such pretty blue cashmere dresses with blue silk sashes, and shoes for all– Annie looks so nice in black lace– dress and John Q. in black cloth suit. Mrs. Jennings called and brought a gold headed cane engraved D. H. W. and gave me the present to take to my husband. Dinner is to be at 4. we all went up in a carriage– The house looked very nice and the supper was nicely arranged– such a crowd for a private house we shall soon need a hall to assemble in– came home about eleven all well and happy only rather tired– children did lovely– [p. 324] {p. 324}

Annie and myself were invited over to Talula’s to lunch– had such a dainty lunch served on Talula’s hand painted china– Annie had to go home with the afternoon train, so we did not have much time to stay Jote [Josephine] Spencer was the only other guest– though Aunt Zina came in and sat down with us before we finished– the children behaved so prettily and quite astonished the girls. Such a pleasure to have children so sweet-mannered and polite– I had a nice fire in the parlor and everything ready expecting my husband to come and he came quite early had supper with me and we had a pleasant evening, going over books papers and letters [p. 325] {p. 325}

A very dull morning and we slept late– breakfasted– between eleven and twelve– Pres. Wells sat and read the papers while I attended to callers in the Office– then we had a visit of an hour or so and he went away. Telegram from Will & Mell to him yesterday of congratulations on his birthday– it arrived on the 27 but did not get to the house– Went to Sister Stevenson’s in the evening it was the birthday of Ezra the eldest son 26 years old– quite a brilliant party– Aunt Zina went along with me for company– with each other– there was no amusement or anything except music, conversation and refreshments, which were very good. the campaign electioneering has begun for delegate to Congress [p. 326] {p. 326}

This morning Aunt Zina and I started on the 7.10 train for Lehi where we were to attend the Annual meeting of the Relief Society– Sister Standring was ready to receive us and gave us a warm welcome at her home– at 10 A.M. we repaired to the Relief Society Hall and had such a nice meeting– I spoke before Aunt Zina by her request. At dinner there were several sisters from other places and in the afternoon we had such a crowded house– Aunt Zina urged me to make the opening address which I did, towards the close of the meeting Zina spoke in tongues and as I could not excuse my self I gave the interpretation In the evening we all went to the political meeting to hear John E. Booth of Provo [p. 327] {p. 327}

Next morning or rather this morning– train was late, so we drove over to American Fork, Sister Standring with us, had meeting with the Relief Society in the Meeting house, the Bishop was present and some other brethren. had a good meeting but not so spirited as at Lehi– went to Sister Ellen [Gemmell] Clark’s to dinner– such an elaborate dinner– afternoon meeting much better attended and a greater flow of the spirit I spoke much easier in the afternoon– Aunt Zina spoke in tongues and I gave the interpretation and it was very powerful as it was also at Lehi– after meeting I took the train for home and Aunt Zina went on to Provo– we administered to some sick people– train came in very late, spent the evening here alone. [p. 328] {p. 328}